The Latest Gossip

Newsletter article for May 2001

© 2001 by Rev. Paul A. Wolff

Have you heard the latest about you-know-who? The attraction of gossip is that it seems to give a person some measure of power or control over someone else. It is difficult to resist the urge to spread some information about a person which puts them down in some way, because if someone else is lowered then it seems as if you are being raised by comparison. Even if you are on the receiving end of gossip it is a strong temptation because no one wants to be left out of the information loop.

Much gossip is justified because it gives the appearance of truth, but whether or not it is true, it may still be gossip. Gossip should be thought of as any kind of talk which is unflattering to someone else. The Golden Rule is in effect here. If you wouldn’t want someone talking about you in a particular manner, then you ought not speak of others in that same way. The eighth commandment says, “You shall not give false testimony against your neighbor.” God wants us to respect the good name and reputation of other people, just as we ought to respect God’s name and reputation. The danger of gossip is that, whether true or false, it causes people to think less of the subject of your gossip.

God’s word calls gossip a betrayal. “A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy man keeps a secret.” (Proverbs 11:13) So here we see that although I said above that gossip seems to raise the status of those who spread it in comparison to others, in reality those who gossip show themselves to be untrustworthy. Who would confide in a person who is likely to spread your secrets to others in such a destructive way? “A perverse man stirs up dissension, and a gossip separates close friends.” (Prov. 16:28) If someone who gossips is not trustworthy, then that harms friendships. We need to have friends we can trust, not those who will speak against us behind our back.

No matter how someone may justify spreading gossip, those who look for opportunities to put others down are simply troublemakers. Proverbs 26:20 says, “Without wood a fire goes out; without gossip a quarrel dies down.” There is always something exciting about a quarrel, or an argument, or a dispute between people. I suppose that explains why television shows like the Jerry Springer show have a measure of popularity. The problem is that such excitement appeals only to our lower (sinful) nature. Such behavior is completely unacceptable for God’s people.

In his Small Catechism, Martin Luther explains the Eighth Commandment in this way: “We should fear and love God so that we do not tell lies about our neighbor, betray him, slander him, or hurt his reputation, but defend him, speak well of him, and explain everything in the kindest way.” This is how God wants us to behave in regard for other people’s good name. If we only speak well of others we show ourselves as people of good character, trustworthy, and a good friend. St. Paul writes in I Thessalonians 5:11, 13, 15 “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing…. Live in peace with each other…. Always try to be kind to each other and to everyone else.” If you want people to speak well of you, then begin by only speaking well of others. Put the best construction on everything. Give people the benefit of the doubt. Instead of telling of people’s faults and shortcomings, speak of their good points, their strengths, their likable qualities.

There are many Biblical examples of people who obeyed the Eighth Commandment in this way. Jonathan defended David to his Father, King Saul, even though Jonathan knew that he would not succeed his father as king because God favored David (I Samuel 19). The people of Capernaum spoke well of the Roman centurion in Luke 7. Jesus defended the actions of the woman who poured perfume on him (Mark 14) when some criticized her actions. Let us all work hard to avoid gossip. Let us speak well of others, that they may speak well of us, and let the Gospel of Christ shine through in our lives in every way.